Boy times two

The big news, the holding-my-breath news, is here: it's a boy! Another boy, a baby brother, a boy cousin to add to the passel, another scrumptious munchkin.

I was terribly worried before the ultrasound (which happened on Wednesday) that I would be disappointed if it were a boy, that I would be upset that we don't have the girl we wanted to add to our family. But on seeing him, all those worries went out the window, and in fact I felt sure that I had secretly known all along. Buying girl baby clothes, the dream of a pigtailed daughter--the last few weeks of not-knowing gave me time to indulge in those impulses and then set them aside. 

Because he's HIM! He's been a boy this whole time, of course, so it seems silly to wish for the girl he isn't. We got to see his feet, all tucked up by his head, his little hand hanging on to the umbilical cord, and his face--a shadowy glimpse of his perfect innocent face. He's a robust baby, measuring bigger than we thought, with plenty of room in the amniotic sac for growing even bigger. 

Indeed, what struck me this time was just how cool it is to get this glimpse inside not only my body, but inside my boy's body. This (and our 30-week ultrasound) will be our only glimpse of his cerebellum, his ventricled pumping heart, his femur and aorta, his liver and bladder (happily full of fluid). The last time we saw Gabriel's insides was when he was in utero, and (barring sickness or injury, Lord willing) we won't have occasion to see them again. So this is a very special view into the miracle of a whole body growing out of nothing, but also the simple miracle of everyone's body--the intricate dance of organs and neurons, bones and skin. 

The more I think about it, the more I'm excited about Gabriel having a brother, partners in crime. It's comforting to know that we've at least got two years of experience raising a boy under our belts, and the thrifty part of me is happy that Gabriel's adorable stripey clothes will be put to good use again. 

Mostly, now that we know, it will be fun to start dreaming of who he will be (and debating over his name--boy names are tough). Will he be a dark curly-haired copy of his father? Or will he be blonde and blue-eyed like his big brother? Will he be a daredevil and a spitfire or will he be a cautious fellow like his brother (and his parents)? Will he be a good sleeper, quite unlike his brother? (Oh Lord, please let him be a sleeper...)