22 October 2008

Grandpa

My grandfather was very sick, but it didn't seem possible that he would leave us so quickly. I was able to talk to him on Sunday just before they gave him morphine for the pain, before he entered a cloud of sleep and medicine, a conversation for which I am so profoundly grateful. He was tired and hurting, but still his matter-of-fact self, his laconic midwestern voice the same as ever. I told him we would talk again in a couple of days, but by Monday evening he was gone. I told him that I love him.

Tomorrow I fly to Chicago, where I'll meet my dad and brother, spend the night at my uncle's, and then drive to Iowa together for the funeral. I still can't believe that the last-minute ticket was so reasonably priced, and I'm astonished that I am even able to go to the funeral. It's a strange thing to be so happy about that even in the midst of sadness, looking forward to seeing family and being with them to celebrate grandpa's life.

3 comments:

kate said...

So sorry, Robin (and family). You're all in my thoughts and prayers. I hope time with family is a healing time of greiving a loss and celebrating this life.

Sara said...

oh robin, i am sorry for your loss...sounds very similar to when i lost my grandfather studying at oxford. i will never forget how great you girls were in supporting me (my grandparents are also from iowa!) best wishes in your travel and hope the time with your family fills you...
blessings.
-sara

Robin said...

Kate! Thanks for your note. How's Gothenburg? Heading down to Barcelona any time?

Sara dear, thanks so much. I do remember that from our Oxford year, now that you remind me. I liked your last post, too...skipping ahead to celebrations and holidays does indeed sound nice.